digital natives and digital immigrants: how to feel more at home on the internet

By alice | December 4, 2009

(Thanks to Shefaly, without whom this post would never have been written for more reasons than one :-)

I’ve spend endless hours of fun complaining about not being a “digital native”. If I were a digital native, I’m sure, the following would surely apply to me as they must do to everyone born after circa 2000:

a) I would always love being online and never find it frustrating, or irritating, or a time-drain, as I would come and go lightly without getting accidentally suckered into reading the Daily bloody Mail etc,
b) small tasks like posting a photo on facebook would come easily to me, I would not do as I just did and accidentally post the wrong photo because I couldn’t find the file where the other photos went when I was trying to be more organised instead of putting everything into an inappropriately-named file,
c) I would have six gazillion friends on Facebook,
d) none of whom would annoy me,
e) stuff would never randomly break down on me, ebay would be enjoyable, and all my shipping & handling costs would be free.

Right. It’s nonsense. Here’s what I think the real differences are between me and the younger generation, based on observing my kids’ internet use- they are not a bad two-person sample, with very different learning styles and online activities.

a) they are always confident and comfortable online, never grumble about hating the internet etc,
b) they expect things to go wrong sometimes,
c) when things do go wrong, they may get frustrated, or they may just leave it and do something else,
d) they never feel they are wasting time- they stop when bored, and being happily occupied is never considered wasteful!
e) they make much better use of youtube and other non-written sources of information, than I do,
f) they integrate their internet life and the rest of their life much more creatively than me, and draw no kind of line between them at all.

This last one is very important. We are all now beginning to realise that this is one world, not two, and our online and offline activities are all part of the same picture, and there is nowhere to “hide”! Many errors result from thinking you can be a different person in different spheres: integrity is about being real wherever you are. Going anonymous to attack people is wrong, and posting obscenities on facebook then blaming your parents for being nosey when they find them, is naive! If you’re used to manipulating people by behaving differently according to who you talk to, the internet will make you uneasy: it’s not possible to get very far here without saying quite a lot in full view, and being genuine. A lot of older people find that scary, I think. They just aren’t used to public speaking- which is what this is! Whereas there are still doubtless plenty of younger people who expect the older generation to stay indoors doing embroidery or playing cards forever, who will be upset when their desire to impress their especially badly-behaved peers comes up against their desire to have parents pay their college fees, or who may find themselves regretting their contributions to google images when they leave college and want a besuited job.

The real you probably needs to live in the real world, which includes internet and everyone else in the world. What matters is not the generation gap of today, but the way forward towards getting the most out of your own real life. And doing this requires realism and work.

Shefaly wrote here about Professor John Palfrey’s definition of the “digital native”, and reinterpreted his terms to coin the phrase “naturalised digital citizen”, which I think is more applicable and also sums up what I see as the only essential, non-learnable difference between digital natives and non-natives: that the former feel more at home here (and the implications of that attitude on what they do). The immigrant perspective is a minority view, because most people remain citizens in their original countries, but it can teach you quite a lot about these artificial boundaries between one thing and another, when none of those hard lines actually apply to you. One of the main reasons I moved to Texas was a very strong feeling, which is a terribly difficult thing to explain convincingly to people: yet feeling “at home” is important to our wellbeing, confidence and growth, and helps us learn and grow in a very profound way.

We are not citizens of the internet and/or the rest-of-the-world/ meatspace/ “real life”: we are citizens of the whole world, which includes both. We have access to both spheres, so our dual citizenship there is undeniable. My mother is a citizen of the internet, because she could go there if she learned how: but she is not a citizen of China, so would need a visa and only be allowed to visit. Some of us are making the most we can from what the internet offers us and learning all the time; some of us have more trouble with this than others; some of us take a more positive attitude towards it than others; some of us are in denial about what the internet could do for us and suffer as a result without ever realising this. Some of us may genuinely not have much use for online tools in our lives. And the latter don’t have to worry much, so far anyway, about becoming comfortable and confident and au fait with these forms of communication and information-finding.

And those of us who are here for better or worse may as well get used to it! Having said I’m not as comfortable as my kids are, I must admit that, however gradually, I do find myself becoming more “at home” online, and less peeved and frustrated when things go wrong, or seem too much for my limited abilities. A big part of that is ease at chilling out and taking breaks- which (perhaps surprisingly, if you haven’t noticed this before) also happens to be an important skill which true digital natives are actually really good at. Both my children are entirely happy to give up if something is proving impossibly difficult, or if they aren’t inclined to tackle something problematic online right now, and wander off to do something else, online or offline. The point is, the problem will still be there when you get back, and it’s never that urgent. Whereas people my age will struggle and complain, keep at it long past the point of fruitfulness, and generally rage against the machine to no end other than winding ourselves up. We actually feel bad about just leaving it. This way, we keep ourselves feeling alienated, almost on purpose, choosing to stay when the nature of the new world-with-internet is that, nearly always, there will be a new way tomorrow.

So I think the one biggest thing you can do to get more native online, given being committed to learning already, is simply to get better at leaving things. One thing we do know about the internet is, it’s not going anywhere. We may as well make ourselves as comfortable as possible. And one sure sign of being at home is, being confident enough to know that you can take a break, go away and when you come back, everything will still be just the same constantly changing, just as it always has been :-)

1 Comment »

One Response to “digital natives and digital immigrants: how to feel more at home on the internet”

Shefaly Says:
December 4th, 2009 at 5:32 pm

Alice: Great post. And thanks for the hat-tip.